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The Truth About Constant Reassurance Seeking
The need for reassurance can begin with something as simple as noticing that someone you care about seems a little quieter than usual. Maybe their messages are shorter, they take longer to respond, or their tone seems different. They may not seem as affectionate as they normally are. Nothing has necessarily happened. There has been…
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When One Critical Comment Changes How You See Yourself
Someone offers you a small correction. Maybe your boss says, “Next time, I’d like you to do it this way.” Your spouse says, “I wish you would have handled that differently.” A friend tells you something you said bothered them. The conversation lasts five minutes. But you carry it for five hours. Maybe five days. …
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Why Compliments Make You Doubt Yourself?
“Why can’t I accept compliments?” Someone tells you that you did a great job. You immediately explain why it really wasn’t that impressive. Someone tells you that you look nice. You point out what you do not like about your appearance. Someone says you are a great parent, a good friend, talented, thoughtful, intelligent, hardworking,…
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Breaking Free From Feeling Not Good Enough
Have you ever noticed how much grace you are willing to give everyone except yourself? Someone you love makes a mistake, and you can understand. They are tired. They are learning. They did not know then what they know now. They are human. You can see the whole picture. But when you make a mistake,…
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Why Does My Mind Always Go to the Worst-Case Scenario?
Have you ever noticed how quickly your mind jumps to the worst possible outcome? A friend doesn’t answer your text, and you wonder if they’re upset with you. Your spouse says, “Can we talk later?” and your mind immediately imagines divorce. Your boss schedules a meeting, and before you’ve even walked into the office, you’ve convinced yourself you’re being fired. A headache becomes a brain tumor. A cough becomes cancer. A…
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Trauma, Shame, and Pain Make You Feel Broken
There are few words people use to describe themselves that carry more weight than the word Broken. Unlike saying, “I’m having a hard time,” or, “I’ve been through a lot,” calling yourself broken is not simply describing your circumstances. It is describing your identity. It suggests that something deep inside of you has been permanently damaged, that you no longer work the…
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Why Your Mind Gets Stuck in the Anxiety Cycle
If you’ve ever found yourself lying awake at two o’clock in the morning replaying conversations, imagining worst-case scenarios, or mentally preparing for problems that haven’t happened, you’ve probably asked yourself, “Why can’t I stop worrying?” You may even recognize that your thoughts are irrational, yet no matter how hard you try to think differently, your mind keeps returning to the same fears. You tell yourself to…
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Healing the Wounds That Make You Feel Unlovable
Have you ever found yourself wondering, “Why do I feel so unlovable?” It is one of the most painful questions a person can ask because it strikes at the heart of identity rather than circumstance. It is not simply about whether someone returned your text, remembered your birthday, or expressed appreciation for you today. Instead,…
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Why Social Media Makes You Feel Behind—and How to Stop Comparing
Comparing You weren’t even having a bad day. That’s the crazy part. You were just sitting on the couch. Maybe waiting for dinner. Maybe avoiding folding laundry. Maybe you had exactly seven minutes before someone needed something from you. So… you picked up your phone. One little scroll. That’s all, you tell yourself. And there…
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Why Reassurance Never Really Makes You Feel Secure
Reassurance: You tell yourself you’re not going to ask this time. You’re going to be chill.You’re going to trust it.You’re going to let it go. And then… “Are you sure we’re okay?”“Did I do something wrong?”“You’re not upset with me, right?” And the second you hit send…you feel it. That little wave of: “Why did…
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